Sunday, August 2, 2015

Emotional Eating......the struggle is real

Today has been a really hard day. It hasn’t been all bad. I went to church with my daughter this morning, but when I got home I feel like I just mentally fell apart.

Sometimes for no real reason life just gets in the way. I get stuck in my head. I worry over things that I can’t control and then I find myself wanting to eat. Lucky for me right now there’s nothing in the house that can easily be snacked on. I threw most all of it out when I realized I have a tendency to binge eat and needed to gain control. I know that I need to prep the meals for the week, and I have every intention of doing so as soon as I get a hold of my head. Sometimes I feel crazy.

My PCOS and Insulin Resistance are out of control. I’m trying to figure out exactly what needs to be done but without access to a dr at the moment it’s proving to be more difficult that I thought it would be initially. I took my last birth control pill a week ago today and have not spotted or bled at all. I took a test and it was negative, so no baby either. I’m panicking a little bit because they were really high dose birth control pills so when I stopped taking the active ones I definitely should have had a period :-/

Insulin resistance has got to be one of the toughest diseases to manage. I’m not saying other diseases are easy especially if you have an allergy to gluten or any food really, I’m just saying that insulin resistance is tricky. It’s a constant battle of fighting the urge to eat carbs and sugar because your body is producing extra insulin and then when you do eat something high in carbs or sugar instead of just using the excess insulin your body has already produced, it just produces more! What’s up with that!? Guess what happens next?! That extra insulin is stored as fat, and that is why in a month I have put on 15 lbs out of nowhere :(

One thing I have found that helps though is my daily dose of dense nutrition. I drink a shake in the morning that is low on the glycemic index and full of super foods that helps me fight those cravings for extra carbs and sugars through out the day. It’s probably one of the best things food wise that has ever happened to me. Today I had chocolate with some peanut butter added to it and it tasted just like a Reeses PB Cup! Um, yes please! And it’s super filling!

This week I am going to focus on fighting my urge to eat when I’m emotional. I am going to focus on a better and healthier outlet for dealing with my emotions! I’m also going to try to post daily, some points in life I’m better at keeping a diary than others. I feel the only way to fight through this food addiction though is to keep on posting and letting others in on my journey. My triumphs and my setbacks.

If anyone else out there is struggling with food addiction, or weightloss, comment or find my on instagram (link over on the right side) and lets connect. You’re not alone, even though sometimes it may feel like you are.

~JesseeKay